look how i've grown! [redux]

aimei and i are both very pleased to discover that - surprise surprise - i have actually learnt something over the past two years! nine pm at kembangan mrt station [third door, never more, never less] to send the uk gang off. my dear fellow ja'dye was listening to my newest dilemma - go for boc [firefighter's ocs] or stay in central fire station where i am so deliriously happy. two years younger and i'd be vacillating, wringing hair and shooting off ten consecutive smses. but now nooo - i catch myself midsentence because i find i actually have the answer. so now it is me spending my one more year in central, more corpses, more fires, more time with the band of brothers. no more saving myself for some abstract utopian future. this is happy now, so happy doing ns, very happy in central.

URA Wednesdays - Death Cab for Cutie

one of my favourite bands, dcfc released its new album a few months back [i think]. this could be a blessing in disguise but because dcfc is a relative unknown in singapore, getting their latest news/music is harder than getting a five-yolk mooncake. anyhow, the latest album "plans", released under a new label, no more barsuk records, proving that this very talented outfit's beginning to make it bigger in the states.

if i could open my arms
and span the length of the isle of manhattan,
i'd bring it to where you are
making a lake of the east river and hudson.
if I could open my mouth
wide enough for a marching band to march out,
they would make your name sing
and bend through alleys and bounce off other buildings
Marching Bands of Manhattan

ben gibbard's lyrics are still mournful as ever, makes you want to rip your heart out and eat it. his voice slicing the air the way his lyrics are really a knife slicing into life, revealing its essence. love, life, loss. aghhh. the album seems to be a continuation of "transatlanticism" in its sound [more tempered rock than pre-tranatlanticism dcfc] and imagery [water keeps coming back, one could almost feel it wash over you. like life does, like dcfc's songs do]. listen to this album, you must.

you and me
have seen everything to see
from bangkok to calgary,
and the soles of your shoes are all worn down.
the time for sleep is now
it's nothing to cry about,
because we'll hold each other soon,
in the blackest of rooms.

if heaven and hell decide
that they both are satisfied
illuminate the no's on their vacancy signs
I Will Follow You Into the Dark

recalcitrant

funny enough, i amone of those people averse to happiness. boys that sms me too much turn me off completely; girls that look at me in that way get a big friendly slap on the back that shouts "brother!". instead i yearn for big impossibilities - monica from a year ago, maxine from press play, timothy nga and cameron diaz on tv. whoo whee! i am, frighteningly, the guy who loves the chase but not the catch. intimacy? not from where i can easily get it. love? leave it that blurry blob on the horizon.

and then last night i had that strange dream
where everything was exactly how it seemed
where concerns about the world getting warmer
the people thought they were just being rewarded
for treating others as they like to be treated
for obeying stop signs and curing diseases
for mailing letters with the address of the sender
now we can swim any day in november

last night i was disturbed from some good shit sleep by one such catch. 'twas a good catch, too good i suspect. so now my handphone becomes an object of intense loath. answers, i have not. apologies, plenty. so, sorry T. i really mean it, only in a very unrepenting, recalcitrant sort of way.

dont wake me i plan on sleeping in
Sleeping In, The Postal Service [or as rachel puts it, the postal code]

hurtling

hurtling, originally uploaded by abcdefghivan.

the news actually got it right

Bush - One of the worst disasters to hit the US, originally uploaded by lloydi.

URA Wednesdays

koc, originally uploaded by abcdefghivan.

I'd Rather Dance With You
so let your hips do the talking/ i'll make you laugh by acting like the guy who sings



Sleep
well i could sleep forever/ but it's of her i dream

"..idiots."

"..idiots.", originally uploaded by abcdefghivan.

gawd i miss dharma, ND, and all the silly ran-dom theem thakka theem, we will rock you. life in town, so insipid.

URA Wednesdays - Cocteau Twins

trippy with fack french accents. for the way she says hustler like hoostler and famous as feemous.

"it's amazing though, yeah, i mean thats...i mean really the records are...a representation of our coping skills...and i think...i was very much in denial...and i think that you can hear that on the album [blue bell knoll]...you know, not one word can you grasp...giving anything away...it just wasn't allowed..." NPR interview, '93

"a lot of the stuff i was singing about [in the early 1980's] was all metaphorical. i wasnt talking like i am now. i guess it's back to how much personal power you feel that you have. like, if i'm 17 and i dont even know when i'm hungry, am i tired, have i had any sleep - if you dont even know that, then how can you talk about lyrics that come from such an unconscious place? i always said 'i dont know', and i didnt." alternative press, '95

Heaven or Hell
he's a hustler/ it's a role, he'll never make a suit

Cherry-coloured funk (feat. The Cure!)
beetles and eggs and blues and bells and eggs and then blues