because

because i am a boy, never anything else. because day after day i start to see a man. because i must be immortal - i must live on, somehow. because i someday will die, so little time, so many things to do. because i am driven, with goals in life. because, after all, how much really matters - should i even try? because i dont have time or fancy for drivel from people who want to talk. because now, here i am, talking. because i am running and swimming, tennis and football. because i am eat and drink and tv and internet and sleep and shit. because i am, like, tOkKiN LiDdAt HaLf e TiMe. because i am gauguin, 'allo 'allo and DCFC. because i am not willing to get cable because it is "a waste of money". because i dont think twice about taking a cab anywhere and everywhere. because i am Save Nguyen Tuong Van and Save The Earth. because now all i do is turn away, and turn the newspaper pages. because i am dark-skinned and large-eyed with double lids. because the only time i ever spoke the truth was in chinese. because i am no gambling and no drinking and will not "backbite" or "slander". because i am mad stupor and wild sex. because i will always love monica, always remember amanda. because i also ogle at guys' asses. because to me theres nothing like living in the now. because i can never stop thinking of tomorrow. because i dont want to crush you, but i feel like crushing you.

so, yes, how could i not be quite very frightened?