fifteen by yoji yamada

one of those films that gave me The Feeling, like american beauty and run lola run. daisuke is bound in life to things he never asked for - a smothering mother, an awkward father, and an eternity in school. unsatisfied and thirsting for more, he ups in search of an ancient cedar far away from his home in yokohama, hitchhiking to his mecca. his first encounter is an old man brought up the old school way, and his opinions are so unpalatable to daisuke that tries to jump out in the middle of the highway - daisuke can no longer tolerate a second more of being suffocated. daisuke is next picked up by two men, one a bumbling unsuccessful man, the other a truck driver. in a uniting moment, the truck driver relates the former's plight, and the two [it is revealed later the truck driver had tried to run away from home before] ponder the possibilities of their lives. he next accepts a ride from a female truck driver, a mother too, who seems to understand daisuke and also daisuke's mother. what later surfaces is that she faces the same problem with her son, an overweight overaged boy closed in on himself. daisuke and the son connect in more ways than one. they are ronins, masterless samurai who will progress at their own pace, at the beckoning of no one. in the same way that daisuke's father thinks of his son as a fool and constantly tries to make him experience the world, the lady trucker realises that she has been mistaken, that her own son actually has deeper thoughts than she thinks. they part ways and he next meets a climber on her way to the cedar. on the way, she advices "if it gets dark, or rains, take shelter and wait for help". for daisuke, however, it will not work - "if i walk more, i might find my way out" - and this conveniently conveys the crux of the film - to what extent should man find his own way out in life? his last encounter is with another old man. and this time daisuke faces the question of what it takes to grow, become "full fledged", age and die. in the film, people who have grown up the "good" way are not "full fledged", whereas the reverse is the opposite, showing that there are actually many ways to growing up. through the film, daisuke is shown to be hardworking, thoughtful and sensitive as much as he is idealistic and rebellious. when he returns, his father recognises his maturity and does not reprimand him. in the end, daisuke is confident and emboldened by his identity as a ronin, and is hence able to reconcile himself to school because he appreciates his way of growing up as one that is not hampered by school.