"my paranoia"

at first you feel so alone, alone with your own desire. that desire that pursues you everywhere, pursues you in your thoughts, as you walk down the streets, as you daydream at your desk in english lit class. you stay busy, you keep running. but the moment you are still, the second you stop to breathe, it's there waiting for you.

how could they see inside me and know what i did not even know myself?

the train in the night rushing silently forward, the dark tunnel-like night where only the light of the compartment windows broke through the darkness. no-one in sight and only the streetlamps break the tunnel-like blackness.

i felt the fulfilment of touching one like me, no longer alone. the world stopped at that moment. ten years of pent-up emotions flowed through that kiss. i stopped running from desire, and desire was there. calm, waiting for me. i was free.